3 Things To Understand About The Tough Times

There are times when life deals us such a harsh blow that it takes our breath away. We lose a loved one, we lose our job, our partner gets sick or hurt, we get into financial difficulties. The overwhelming feeling of hopelessness as we watch the world that we have so carefully created crumble can be all-consuming.

So how do we find a way out? How do we push past the despair and punch a hole, even a tiny one, through the darkest of times and let in a chink of light?

The times when things are falling apart and the challenges you face may seem insurmountable and they can either define you, destroy you or strengthen you.

Some of us may rely on our spiritual beliefs, some of us may turn to the people we cherish in our lives for comfort, but some of us turn inward and become completely and utterly burdened with our worries.

A few of the most loving, well-rounded people I have ever met are those who have known despair, known misery, known heartache and known loss. They have found a way out of the very depths of their own hell and by doing so they have gained an appreciation and understanding of life.

These people aren’t born; they develop. So what weapons do they have in their armoury? What makes them able to fight despair and win?

Girl leaning up against a window with the text - 3 things to understand about the tough times

3 Things To Understand About The Tough Times

  1. They understand that pain is part of life. We are hardwired to be afraid of pain – both physical and emotional. But the harsh reality is that life and love sometimes hurt. Feeling pain is just as valid as feeling love, it is a part of you and you have the right to feel it, to live through it, to learn from it. Know this; you will only ever know your own strength when being strong is the only choice you have.
  2. They know that experience, even of the negative kind, inevitably means growth. Life isn’t perfect, no matter how well organised we are or how well we plan we cannot anticipate all the twists and turns that life throws at us. In order to shape a lump of marble into a work of art the hammer and chisel have to strike their blows. Knowing that the blow from the chisel and the smooth, beauty of the marble are all part of the same creative process makes it easier to be at peace with life’s ups and downs.
  3. They know they are not alone. When times are at their blackest it may seem that ‘everyone else’ is doing just fine. Believe me, they are not. Every single person is struggling with something in their life, they are all fighting their own battles. And there will always be someone who can relate to you because they are working their way through the exact same problems you are. My friend, there is someone out there who is feeling the struggle as you do, experiencing the same pain as you, battling the same emotions. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

It’s hard I know, but when times are tough you must be tougher. Life may be difficult, yet is it truly gobsmackingly awesome!


  1. May 22, 2016 / 5:50 pm

    When something bad happens to me I’ve learned that no matter how much it hurts, that pain won’t last forever & at some point I will come out the other side. However when something happens to a child, any child, not necessarily my own, I fall to pieces. I just cannot bear it or understand it. Being an atheist I don’t believe there is a “better place” or “God has a plan” or even “everything happens for a reason”.
    When a child suffers it is through no fault of their own, there is no up-side it’s simply unacceptable.
    I really wish we could all do more particularly governments. For example I can’t fathom why welcoming child refugees into our country is such a difficult thing to do?
    I mean War in this day & age is ridiculous isn’t it? What the hell are they all fighting about anyway?
    Oh look I’ve gone off on one – Told you, kids. I’d take them all in if they’d let me.

    • May 23, 2016 / 5:06 pm

      Going off on one is positively encouraged Michelle!
      I’m the same when it comes to little ones. I just can’t understand how, in the 21st century, any child should suffer. I don’t have the answer, but something needs to be done. I mean, how can we call ourselves a civilised society when children still starve to death?
      This country (and others) have some really screwed up priorities. Whatever colour rosette the ‘leader’ of this country wears, they never do what we need – they do what they have to to stay in power.
      Now I’ve gone off on one 🙂
      Michelle xxx

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