I Had A Bad Day, This Was Yesterday’s Song

Yesterday wasn’t a great day for me. I had a bad day.

I woke up in a grumpy mood after only getting a few hours sleep. My stomach problems seem to be getting worse, I felt sick all day. Despite having a packed work schedule, I couldn’t get focused. I went for a walk, but it started to rain five minutes in. A friend popped in to see me and insulted me. It was a mild insult, one which I would normally have shrugged off, but it hurt. Mr Chic wasn’t around to give me a cuddle.

I cooked a light lunch, watched the rain beat against the window and napped – which was nice.

Yesterday, I had a bad day. So I sat and looked inward and faced the blackness of my hurt. I had nowhere to run from the hurt, no way to end it.

I then opened up an email which kind of kicked me in the gut. It was highly critical of me, my blog and the way I write. It accused me of photoshopping all my photographs, using a ghost writer and lying about my age. All absolute rubbish of course, and I would usually place an email such as this firmly into the trash and not give it a second thought. Yet as I read each negative comment, I could feel my heart and my spirit drop lower and lower.

It was a very bad day, and my mood became blacker as I thought about how some people might think badly of me.

You know what? Some days are bad days. Some days there is no silver lining. Some days you have absolutely nothing.

Yesterday I had nothing. So I sat and looked inward and faced the blackness of my hurt. I had nowhere to run from the hurt, no way to push it away, no way to end it.

So I faced it. I felt it. Sat with it.

After I allowed my hurt to just ‘be’ it didn’t hang around for that much longer and I felt better. Not great, but better.

And while I was sitting with my hurt I realised that the ‘Michelle’ that was being slated doesn’t exist. It isn’t me that’s being criticised, it’s one person’s perception of me.


I also realised that there will always be some bad days when I have nothing, it’s part of life, part of living. And that’s OK, because tomorrow’s song is yet to be written.

Cheerio.

 

7 Comments

  1. June 15, 2016 / 5:03 pm

    I’m sorry to hear you had such a rubbish day Michelle. I’ve had a few like that lately where I’ve found it hard to pinpoint what’s wrong with me. It’s good advice to be stoical about them and let them flow – tomorrow is most definitely another day.

    I find it outrageous that someone would send you an email like that. Seriously, people have way too much time on their hands. I seem to come across people every day whose sole reason for getting out of bed is to ruin someone else’s day. What losers. Not a good thing to receive when you are already feeling delicate. I’m glad you place it firmly in the place it deserves to be. Having met you in person, I can safely say it is just jealousy on their part.

    • June 15, 2016 / 6:41 pm

      Absolutely Melissa, tomorrow is defiantly another day. There seems to be a lot of people having bad days at the moment, I wonder if it’s the weather. We all look forward to the sun so much, and then we’re presented with rain 🙁
      As for the nasty email, you’d be surprised how many I get. But the lovely emails I get more than make up for it – and I get a lot more good than bad 🙂
      Thank you for your lovely words, they made me smile.
      Michelle xx

  2. June 15, 2016 / 5:54 pm

    Oh yes you are so right woman! Right that it isn’t YOU the person was talking about – Right we sometimes have to just let ourselves feel pain – And right that it’s just life, there are going to be bad days.
    I realised another thing while I was reading your post. Sometimes I don’t think what someone else is going through, how they happen to feel on any given day, when I make off hand comments. The way you take something may not be the way it was intended. You know what I mean? Even a good friend can say something hurtful without realising it.
    Perhaps your friend didn’t intend her comment to come across so harsh?
    I hope you find an answer to your bloating problem, that will make these dark days a whole lot brighter x

  3. June 17, 2016 / 11:29 am

    Such good advice, Michelle. It is hard to do, to just sit with the “black dog.” Our temptation is to distract ourselves or to do something to make it better or make it go away. But by making peace with it, and waiting for the blackness to pass, I think you’re right, it passes faster. I’m wishing you a whole load of good days ahead to make up for this one. And to the person who thinks you photoshop your pictures, NO SHE DOES NOT! Michelle’s skin is annoying perfect in real life as well, like it or not. xxx

    • June 22, 2016 / 7:57 pm

      Thanks Lisa 🙂
      It was one of the worst days I’ve had in a very long time, I’m so lucky that I have friends like you to count on when days like this hit.
      Michelle xx

  4. June 22, 2016 / 10:42 am

    Having spoken to you on the day this happened and leaving it a little while to read your post, it has given me time to calm down enough to now comment…!!

    Firstly: Having seen you MANY times in real life I can attest to the fact that you have the skin of a 30 year old and don’t lie about your age – if you really were younger how you’d have a son aged 30 I have no idea. (And you don’t Photoshop anything out, either.) WHY would someone lie upwards for goodness sake?!! How simple would it be for you to prove it with a copy of your birth certificate, not that you need to do that, and not that you did, which I’m glad you didn’t. Plus WHY WHY WHY would you need a ghost writer? Like most of us you’re not making a six-figure salary from your blog (I assume!!) so I’m sure you’re perfectly capable of finding the time to write your blog and make it bloody fantastic without needing to pay someone else to do it. Some people CAN actually write brilliantly, and you’re one of them. You only have to spend 10 minutes in your wonderful company to know this writing is all yours 🙂

    Writing mean s**t like that to people and thinking that pressing “Send” is a good idea just shows the writer in poor light. As we always say, nice people never do stuff like that and we all know it reflects on the troll, not you. I know you know this but it needs saying all the same…!

    I know the feeling of having the mean reds – and this was one of those days. I’m just glad we were all there to pick you up. Dump on us any time, and we’ll dump all over those that try and bring you down (in a non-trolly kind of way of course, because we never lower ourselves to someone else’s level).

    Seven heads are better than one my darling Michelle 😉

    Catherine xxxxxxxxxxxxxx

    • June 26, 2016 / 11:06 am

      Ah Catherine, this actually brought tears to my eyes – in a good way I hasten to add.

      It’s beggars belief that there are some people out there who have nothing better to do with their time other than to try and make others unhappy. I’m lucky, I have enough of a support system to move on from blows like this quickly. I do worry about the people who take rubbish like this to heart though.

      I’m so glad that my inbox is usually filled with emails from women and men who truly love my writing. Some of them (as you know) have even been helped by my ramblings.

      Thank you for your lovely words Catherine, and your friendship and support – it all means a lot to me 🙂

      Michelle xxxx

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