If you flick through a magazine, surf online or switch on the TV and seek out the beautiful people, and then compare their apparent ‘perfection’ to your own ‘flaws’ how does that make you feel? Bad huh?
It’s a sure-fire way to see your self-confidence plummet, it’s not a useful exercise and it serves no useful purpose. Yet most of us do it at one time or another – and a whole lot of us do it way too frequently.
The Danger Of Comparison In A Media Rich World
If I look at the images on the blogs of twenty somethings who have amazing bodies and wrinkle-free skin, and I then look at my outfit shoots, I don’t come close to measuring up. In fact, you might say that I look pretty bad.
But hang on a second; that’s not a fair comparison. Should I get out of blogging, get depressed, be jealous or resentful just because I’m not in my twenties? Of course not! Instead I look at my strengths: I write honest posts about my life, health and fashion. I write helpful posts for mature women who may be struggling to be the ‘real’ them. I have a whole lot to offer – and that makes me happy.
Being able to seek out and celebrate your own strengths and see your true value is a powerful thing. Without this ability you can be unmotivated and lack belief in yourself.
So how do we stop comparing?
Be aware of what is going through your mind when you are immersed in media. Most of the time we compare ourselves to others without even realising we’re doing it. It’s an act that is done without consciousness. The solution? Become conscious.
By being aware you will be able to spot when you are going down the comparison road. Simply tell yourself to stop, “Stop it!” Don’t have a go at yourself or feel bad about making the comparison – simply acknowledge that you are doing it and change focus. Then fill your mind with thoughts of the things you can do, the things you love, the people in your life and your attributes.
Focus on your strengths but be OK with your imperfections. Not one person in this world is perfect, and deep down we know this. It is human nature to strive for perfection, but we will never be perfect. Sure, we should all keep trying to improve, but absolute perfection is unachievable – and that’s OK! Let’s look at it from a different angle. Your imperfections are what makes you, you – so you are already perfect!
Try to focus on the journey of life. Life is not a competition, don’t worry about how you rank in comparison to others. We are all on a journey together – to become something, to find something, to learn, to create, to love. Our journey is about what we want to do, and where we want to go.
Know that you are enough. Be good with that, and you’ll find contentment.