For those of you who don’t know – I am Welsh. I was born and raised in South Wales, in the steel working town of Port Talbot (or Port Toilet as the we liked to call it). I can’t say that the area I grew up in was the most picturesque; unless you like the look of steel works, BP chemical work or miles of council estate houses. And I can’t say that I didn’t chomp at the bit to leave. Yet I now find myself eager to move back to my roots – though probably not to the same council estate 😜
I think, no matter where in Wales you are born, there is a definite pride that comes with being Welsh. It’s hard to explain; it’s a tickle down deep in my soul that brings a smile to my face whenever I meet another Welsh person, hear about Wales, know I’m going to visit Wales or when we win at rugby 😉
Just to give you a taste of what it’s like to be Welsh, I’ve put together this handy, tongue-in-cheek list of the 36 things you will probably only understand if you are Welsh.
36 Things You Will Probably Only Understand If You Are Welsh
1) You put the words ‘you are’, ‘I do’, ‘I am’, ‘you do’, ‘isn’t it’, etc at the end of sentences — “I’m bloody freezing, I am.” “It’s a lovely day, isn’t it?”
2) “You’re Welsh?! So do you know *insert name of random Welsh person here*?” Um, there are over three million of us, and this blog isn’t that popular – yet.
3) The word llama completely stumps you.
4) You struggle not to put the word ‘like’ at the end of every sentence.
5) It’s ‘togs’ and ‘daps’ not ‘rugby boots’ and ‘plimsolls’.
6) You’re ‘tampin’ not absolutely furious.
7) ‘Up North’ is located between Aberystwyth and Bangor.
8) You look forward to the Summer because the rain gets warmer.
9) You never get ill or poorly, you get ‘bard’.
10) If something is a huge amount of effort it’s a ‘potch’.
11) That coat is, indeed, my jacket.
12) You call your mother ‘mam’ (as in jam) not ‘mum’ or ‘mummy’.
13) You always say thank you to the driver when you get off a bus.
14) A ‘scram’ is a small scratch — “The cat just scrammed me.”
15) The rest of the world has no idea where you are:
17) But lose time by inserting extra words wherever possible – “Where to?” “By there.”
18) You shop in ‘Tescos’ and ‘Asdas’ not ‘Tesco’ and ‘Asda’.
19) Conversations with call centres can end in tears.
20) You don’t need a cuddle, you need a ‘cwtch’.
21) You’re vocabulary includes the words: ‘fairplay’, ‘mun’, ‘innit’, “twp’ ‘lush’ and ‘tidy’.
22) You have to wear this to school every St David’s Day:
But you kind of like it.
23) It’s not unusual to be late for a meeting because you got stuck behind a tractor.
24) A ‘butty’ is a friend not a sandwich.
25) You need an art degree just to draw your country’s flag!
26) Drinking Brains doesn’t mean you’re a zombie, it means you’re sipping the local beer.
27) You watch Doctor Who, Torchwood or Sherlock and spend most of the episode shouting, “I’VE BEEN THERE!”
28) The pain of hearing the pronunciation of Welsh town names.
29) People ask you to say, “What’s occurrin?”
30) “You’re Welsh? Oh, say that long town name!” – Do I look like a performing seal? And no, I can never remember it all.
31) You really confuse people when you tell them; “I’ll do it now, in a minute.”
32) Trying to find a long lost friend on Facebook is impossible.
33) Bands do a UK tour and completely miss your country.
34) You hear the same sheep joke over and over again.
35) When holidaying in America, you have to explain that Wales is not a state in England.
36) It’s impossible to translate ‘hiraeth’ into English but it means:
I believe some of the above may be indicative to South Wales. Let me know in the comments if they are, or if I’ve missed anything off the list.